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The Masks of Anarchy<\/strong><\/span><\/p>\n by Barry Smith<\/em><\/p>\n The song of the Thames-side boatmen The helmsman stands at the rudder The virus may rage in China The scientists say the death-count And everyone\u2019s confined to barracks We\u2019re dishing out contracts like confetti We\u2019re setting out arrangements So why is the death-count climbing Now little Nattie climbs the podium And Woodcock looks shifty-eyed Pottie Piranha takes the lurching helm We\u2019re closing all the schools Now we\u2019re closing pubs and shops We\u2019re honing all the slogans But still the numbers are climbing We\u2019re top of the league for deaths It doesn\u2019t look good in the papers We can meet if we\u2019re in bubbles It\u2019ll all be over by Christmas But we\u2019re heading onto the rocks Now the scientists are telling us The public\u2019s begun to doubt us There\u2019s rumbling in the streets Author’s Note: with apologies to P.B. Shelley.<\/em>\u00a0This is a work of fiction with imaginary characters and events \u2013 it couldn\u2019t happen like this for real, could it?<\/em>\u00a0<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":" The Masks of Anarchy by Barry Smith The song of the Thames-side boatmenAs they sail the ship of stateRings out across the choppy watersWhile the winds of…<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":587,"featured_media":13816,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[1660],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-13819","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-poetry-2"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.gfdesign.co.uk\/culture\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/13819","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.gfdesign.co.uk\/culture\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.gfdesign.co.uk\/culture\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.gfdesign.co.uk\/culture\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/587"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.gfdesign.co.uk\/culture\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=13819"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/www.gfdesign.co.uk\/culture\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/13819\/revisions"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.gfdesign.co.uk\/culture\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/13816"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.gfdesign.co.uk\/culture\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=13819"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.gfdesign.co.uk\/culture\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=13819"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.gfdesign.co.uk\/culture\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=13819"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}
As they sail the ship of state
Rings out across the choppy waters
While the winds of pestilence blow
Row, boys, row!<\/p>\n
Surveying his motley crew
Tousled blond hair all askew
Give it all you\u2019ve got, boys
Row, boys, row!<\/p>\n
And Italy\u2019s hospitals are full
The Spaniards are on their knees
But we\u2019re still playing football
Row, boys, row!<\/p>\n
Is heading for the skies
So jam on the brakes boys
A U-turn is looking wise
Row, boys, row!<\/p>\n
With ambulances lined in a row
Treating patients in the car park
While hospital wards overflow
Row, boys, row!<\/p>\n
Ordering PPE from Pestfix
Aprons and masks from Turkey
And gloves from Nigel\u2019s aunt
Row, boys, row!<\/p>\n
Treatments and tests are ramping up
Our track and trace is brilliant
And our strategy\u2019s world-class
Row, boys, row!<\/p>\n
And numbers going out the roof?
We\u2019re out in the streets hand-clapping
What more can doctors and nurses ask?
Row, boys, row!<\/p>\n
And explains our masks won\u2019t fit
We ordered the wrong specifications
The PPE is rubblish but it\u2019s all we\u2019ve got
So put it on and row, boys, row!<\/p>\n
As the Captain falls sick with covid-flu
He\u2019s whisked off to the hospital
Coughing and spluttering too
Row, boys, row!<\/p>\n
She\u2019s calling up the gunboats
To shaft the migrant crews
It\u2019s diversionary tactics
Row, boys, row!<\/p>\n
And cancelling all the exams
But we\u2019re keeping the pubs open
Serving pints and double Scotch-eggs
Row, boys, row!<\/p>\n
And cancelling the booze
But we\u2019re keeping the schools open
The economy\u2019s got too much to lose
Row, boys, row!<\/p>\n
To get the message through
We\u2019re locking up and locking in
And introducing tiers too
Row, boys, row!<\/p>\n
Our advisers haven\u2019t a clue
We\u2019ve over eighty thousand dead
And we don\u2019t know what to do
Row, boys, row!<\/p>\n
Poor Italy\u2019s left in our wake
We\u2019ve beaten France quite easily
And Germany\u2019s a piece of cake
Row, boys, row!<\/p>\n
It\u2019s hard to explain the amount
But Connings has a nifty wheeze \u2013
Johnny Foreigner can\u2019t count!
Row, boys, row!<\/p>\n
But we\u2019re not allowed indoors
Unless we\u2019re looking after kids
Or clambering up gym bars
Row, boys, row!<\/p>\n
We can carve the turkey breast
And book our Spanish holidays
And have a well-earned rest
Row, boys, row!<\/p>\n
There\u2019s a waterfall ahead
We promised sunny uplands
But landed up the creek instead
Row, boys, row!<\/p>\n
There\u2019s a new variant on the way
We\u2019ve unleashed a world-beating virus
That will blow us all away
Row, boys, row!<\/p>\n
They think we\u2019re telling lies
It\u2019s pain for them and jam for us
As they\u2019re swept away in the surge
Row, boys, row!<\/p>\n
And anarchy in the skies
So put on your face masks boys
And we\u2019ll slip away in disguise
Row, boys, row!<\/p>\n